I Am The Walrus....You Are The Cat

Just talked to my old man. They got a new cat today, male. This is good, exciting news, right? You would think. I was excited for them up until the point where he tells me what they have decided to name him. I won't say the name here, but I will say that it's the name I was pretty much set on for my future son. Obviously, Nicole would have some say in that decision, but my point is this is the name I wanted and was ready to go to bat for in the baby name deliberations. And now they're stealing the name from me...for their cat. I don't know why they couldn't go with Soda. We were all agreed on Soda! I told the old man straight away that we had a little conflict here and they needed to decide whether they wanted their cat and their future grandson to have the same name. I don't think they are changing it. This should be fun. Poor kid is gonna grow up thinking he was named after a friggin' feline. And can you imagine the confusion and mishaps at Christmas?

DAD: "Ooops! Sorry (name of cat/child), that ball of twine was actually supposed to be for the cat (name again)."

DAD: "Ooops! No no (cat name), that cashmere sweater was for (child's name). Give it here now..."

STEPMOM: "Awww but look at how he snuggles into it, honey. He really likes it. Maybe his big brother will be nice and let him have it? What do you say, (child's name)?"

TROUBLED CHILD: "Seriously? Ummm..."

STEPMOM: "Say 'thank you,' (cat's name). Say 'thank you.' Here (child), here's some fresh nip for you."

Thanks, Dad.