Seasons Greetings

--Man, it has been a while. It feels like this is the first time in weeks I've had time to breathe.

Does it ever seem like you have so much on your mind, so many things knocking around your head, that you can't focus on the physical reality around you? It's an interesting sensation to experience while flying down the 405 at 75 mph, let me tell you. It's a weird reversal when your thoughts seem real and the physical world seems like a dream. And this is all without the use of halucinogens.

--I was talking to a friend the other day about the difficulty of doing something that you know is right but feels absolutely wrong. The classic head-vs-heart conflict. It got me thinking...I think the heart knows only what it wants and has no concept of self-preservation or im/possibility. I think that's what keeps us young. Of course, what is adulthood if not the responsibility of doing what's best rather than what's fun? Anyway, I know these are hardly groundbreaking thoughts, but what else is new (see blog title)?

--You know what word I really struggle with? "Inquiry." I can't pronounce it correctly in a casual flow. Unless I want to give up and start saying (ink-wary), I have to stop, stretch out the mouth muscles a little and really focus to say (in-kwer-E). Try it, maybe it's just me.

--Here we are on Christmas Eve Eve and I just barely finished my shopping this afternoon. This was a very rough year for gift-giving and shopping. If it's the thought that counts, I should be allowed to submit a 500-page neurotic manifesto documenting all the mental and emotional strife I put myself through to find the right gifts. And I'm not even sure I did all that well. Better than most years at least, so it's not all for not.

--Got the Annual Freeze-Your-Ass-Off-One-Night-Post-Christmas-Pre-New Years Camping Trip coming up in a few days. Got some new members in the club this year. I am predicting one of the all-time great trips. That's assuming no one gets accidentally shot at the firing range prior to reaching the camp site.

--After that, going up to a cabin in Arrowhead for a couple days and, man oh man, I cannot wait for that. I am going to pour myself a tall drink, sit down in a big armchair with about 3 books and 7 magazines and I am going to read for a solid three to four hours.

(2.5 hours later)

--Just got home from seeing "Juno." Really enjoyed it. Funny, smart, heartwarming flick. It's one of those movies that makes me feel good about life in general, even in the presence of the inevitable shitstorms. If I were an ultra-conservative nutjob, I might worry that it romanticizes teen pregnancy, but, thankfully, I'm not. It's one of those movies that makes me want to come home, put on a classic album really loud, and just lay there and listen to it. Unfortunately, it's too late to do the loud part but I am making do. It's not the quality of the music in the movie that does it, but the volume of it, and the scenes where they talk passionately about music don't hurt much either in that respect. Anyway, it's a great movie.